User blog comment:Yoush/CROSSOVER MGQ/MGE PART 2/@comment-24431359-20140615042145

Yo. It's me, the guy who read your work at the MGE wiki.

You sure work things fast. I didn't expect another chapter to be released this quick! :)

But then again, the sooner, the better, right?

Okay, now allow me to enumerate the few things I've noticed in this chapter:

(Please remember that this is just my personal opinion, something that is made from my own perspective of reading your work. There might be things that you may have seen that I haven't.)


 * 1: First, the heavenly knights seemed to have gotten a lot of NERF on their defenses against sexual attacks. Especially Alma Elma, a frigging Queen Succubus. I thought she would've at least tried out her violent methods (her martial arts attacks back in MGQ chapter 3) if she knows that her enemy will be as much as tough on the sexual attacks division as much as Alma Elma herself.

Possible solution to #1: You could go for a chapter re-write, or at least have the 4 Heavenly knights a round two against the Fallen Maidens in the future chapters, this time with the 4 HK having their ''canon sexual prowess. ''


 * 2: Luka would have been the first person to be sent towards the portal towards the MGE world, because he is, you know, the badass hero. And the guy with the angel halo, who can send anyone's ass flying to the next galaxy by spamming Daystar and Salamander.

Well, that's all, for now.

Good job.